Ypsilanti in Retrospect: Thoughts on Chaosium Con 2023 from a First Timer (Guest Blog by Matt "Doc" Tracey)

I will neither pretend to be eloquent or short of words. Those who know me know that I could spin a yarn about getting a gallon of milk into a 30 minute epic which may or may not involve a brawl in the dairy aisle with some blue-hair who took the last gallon of 2%. So, here are my reflections on my first gaming convention, Chaosium Con 2023. 

 

As someone fairly new to Call of Cthulhu, I didn’t know what to expect at Chaosium Con. I knew that friends I’ve known through various Discord channels would be there, but I didn’t know how meeting them in person would go. I knew that there would be the higher ups and content creators from Chaosium, but I assumed they’d be flanked by a table and some sort of security detail or something a la Comic Con. I expected there to be an overwhelming number of games, but thought there’d be overlapping tables, creating a disaster scene of games overlapping with Cthulhu stomping his way through Runequest’s Glorantha, pirates of 7^th Sea swashbuckling their way past an eldritch ritual…I expected the chaotic sprawl that was New York Comic Con back in the late aughts, early 2010s…

 

I was wrong. 

 

What I found was nothing short of a sublime environment and experience. A community unlike any I’ve ever seen before. A sense of camaraderie that, if we could bottle it, we could probably solve world peace or something.

On the last day of the con, Paul Fricker (renowned author, podcaster, and all around gentleman) mentioned to me that “[he’s] met the nicest people at horror gaming conventions.” After the experience I had at this convention, I wholeheartedly agree. 

I was convinced to go by Bridgett Jeffries, a woman whose positivity and excitement is only surpassed by her seemingly bottomless font of energy. On the Symphony Entertainment Discord server, where she serves as our fearless leader (or as I call her, the conductor), she posted the dates for Chaosium Con and added “I wanna see you all there!” With some minor (read: none required) arm twisting, I was convinced not only to go, but to get a GM badge (on the promise of running three 4-hour games). Easy peasy, right? I’ve run plenty of Cthulhu games, almost exclusively online, mostly with strangers. Why would this be different?  

(This was the last day of the Con, but right before this, Bridgett said to me “Baby, I’m so glad you’re having a good time. I love it!” This woman is a beacon of happy. Love you, B!)

If I’m being honest, my anxiety was at a 12. We went straight past 11 (even making 10 louder). How could I run a bunch of games in person? What if I screwed up? What if I forgot something? What if they don’t like it? What if the strangers are mean? What if they don’t sign up for my games? Well, that last fear was dispelled almost immediately. My games filled up fast. Hell, I had a waitlist. A waitlist! Including one for a scenario I had written! In the same vein, I signed up for a whole lot of things. I mean look at this schedule. The term overbooked comes to mind. Ask anyone around, and they’d probably heard of my “tactical sandwiches” planned in the event I couldn’t get away for a meal (that’s right Bridgett, I ate real food!).

(These were just the events I was attending…) 

(Seriously, I booked probably too much…)

Arriving to Ypsilanti on Wednesday, I half expected Bridgett to find me in the parking lot and rearrange my spine (her hugs have that power). She was the hype woman of getting me not only to go to this Con, but to be super excited about it. Instead, it was an uneventful arrival, checking into my room, dropping my multiple bags (including a full reusable grocery bag full of cookies), and walking back down to the bar. I didn’t recognize anyone around. Maybe I knew them from Discord but didn’t know their face? Maybe it was just some random person in the hotel? Who knows? Then I hear “Hey buddy!” I turn to find one Bucho Rodenberger (who is graciously letting me post this on his blog). I’d played games with Bucho before, we’ve spoken on the Discord servers, and here he was, in the flesh. There was no awkward moment of “Oh hey that’s who you are” or “Now what’s your name?”, instead it was “Want this taco?” I’d be lying if I said that didn’t set the mood for the entire weekend for me: just people sharing with people, a community hanging out and having fun. We play horror games, but the fears stay at the table. And that taco was damned good. 

(Look at this handsome devil… oh and Bucho’s there too!)

That night, I went on a minor adventure (with the incomparable, amazing Rina Haenze, to whom I am indebted...not only for my love of Cthulhu, but also my nickname “Doc”) to Pontiac because they had found a poutine bar. Sure, in hindsight, Pontiac is apparently one of the top 100 most dangerous cities in the US, but damn that poutine was delicious and 100% worth the trip. Getting to spend some quality time with a friend whom I trust inherently and who has been a support person for years? Transcendent. I wouldn’t be a Cthulhu player without them! The theme for the Con in my eyes became “Say yes.” Play in that game. Say hello to that person. Drive nearly an hour to get poutine at a New York-themed queer bar. Eat that cookie (seriously, I brought 9 dozen). 

(Just two friends, hanging out after knowing each other via the Internet since 2019ish. They enrich my life and you should get to know them. They’ll enrich yours too.) 

(Even in Michigan we can’t escape our four-legged furry friends…)          

I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention the best damn breakfast of the Con. Rolling out the next morning with Bridgett, Bucho, Nathan and Samantha Pidde to a small greasy spoon diner down the road before running errands was the makings of a fantastic morning. These weren’t strangers. They were family, complete with Bucho and Bridgett fighting over the bill. Getting back to the hotel, I grabbed some cookies to share from my room, and sitting in the lobby, ran into more friends (as a wild Towie appeared!).

(I see you back there, Bridgett…)

Shortly thereafter, my preconceived notions of the well-known authors, higher-ups, and content creators were shattered when I saw Seth Skorskowsky sitting in the lobby. I struck up a conversation (remember, say yes) and it was like we were old buddies, chatting about game systems, funny incidents in games, and he even gave me a set of his RPG icon dice (dice that both betrayed me and saved me throughout the Con). There was no security detail to haul me off for approaching a VIP. It was just the two of us, chilling at a table, laughing about an exploding 10 in a Cyberpunk game (that, if memory serves, Seth said managed to roll up to a 53?).

A similar vibe permeated the Meet and Greet, when I incidentally (accidentally?) ran into Mike Mason, who helped me figure out an issue that had plagued a scenario I was brainstorming (stupid copyright laws!). And he did so without hesitation. I walked up to chat with Paul Fricker, and Mike came along with drinks and said hello. I’m not good with faces, so I thought nothing of it until I saw the nametag. I casually mentioned my struggles, he just went “Well why not this?” (completely, as I described it “unfucking my shit”) before adding “If you need help, you have my E-mail. Just make sure to use it, don’t abuse it!” (added with a massive smile and a good laugh). You can’t buy that sense of community. 

(Fun fact: I didn’t recognize Mike Mason until after this photo was taken! L-R: Mike Mason, Paul Fricker, Matt "Doc" Tracey)

(Bask in Heather’s and my greatness at the Mixer Bask! BASK!) 

The biggest highlight of the Con, to me, was the Symphony Entertainment family photo. Bridgett had said we all need to meet at 8:30 during the mixer. Getting everyone together in a single place, in person. Seeing the sheer number of people present was awe-inspiring. I’m getting that photo framed in my office. I love this community. 

(Family can come in a lot of forms. This one is mine.)

I could write up a full minute-to-minute detailed breakdown of all the events, games, and happenings, all the moments that put a smile on my face, but as Steve Rogers once said “No, I don’t think I will." We’d be here for days and days if I went into every single detail. But I do wanna drop some happy moments that continue to put a smile on my face. These are mostly in chronological order…  

When running my scenario, “All Part of the Game," a player ran up and said she was ecstatic to play this with the author. Mary, if you’re reading this, you made my entire day saying that. Took my anxiety down several pegs. Add in the game going in directions I had never expected, including our Doctor of Medicine being played by a nurse and picking up on the subtleties in a murder mystery party gone wrong and Suzanne declaring me her newest best friend because I brought cookies (I saved the last salted caramel butterscotch one for her but didn’t see her on Sunday…) and this was off to a killer start. No pun intended. 

During the Old Ways Live! Panel, Miranda brought out “puppet Nate”, a pseudo-mascot of the entire week, this felted friend made many an appearance. There was also the “Daddy Energy” stickers, the Nate face masks on sticks… Thanks to Miranda, I have the weirdest bag of con swag that I’ve ever brought home. 

(The Old Ways Live!, featuring an all-star cast of Michael, Rina, Miranda, and a muppet -love ya, Nate!-, a disputed will, and a spectral orangutan.) 

(Father and son? You can see the resemblance! Sometimes I forget which is the puppet…) 

That night, I played in a VIP game of “Penetralia” by Scott Dorward, run by Paul Fricker (how could I resist trying to get into this table?!) Flanked by Towie, Bucho, Heinrich Moore, and two gentleman I just met that night, this will go down as one of the most memorable games, complete with a philosophical discussion on utilitarianism as it applies to homelessness and firebombing a house (shoutout Bucho for the arson). And to add to the VIP element, John Wick, author of 7^th Sea, was at the next table over. A major takeaway I love for this scenario was Paul’s on the fly character creation. There were pre-gen notes, but the occupation, allocation of points, etc. was done in ~15 minutes, owing to a crash course sheet given to all of us. 

(This table was legendary. Was I running on pure adrenaline and cookies? Yes. Worth it.)

The next day was rife with lots of amazing moments. Attending a workshop with Nate and Sam from “Up Your RPG” on how to improve as a game master was incredibly useful. Simple tricks to go from good to great. Add in the CCC Happy Hour Meet and Greet with Community Creators and having a casual chat with Ben Burns, author of Corsairs of Cthulhu without realizing who he was (seriously, I’m bad with names/faces). We chatted about layout, adventures, etc. and he mentioned he was an author. I asked if it was anything I might know. Ope. 

That’s the thing about this con. At Comic Con, you can tell who’s who because of a security detail or a table in front of ‘em. Here? Even the most VIP content creators are just hanging out, having a mimosa with everyone else. That’s what makes this entire experience unique and special. Add in a workshop by the unparalleled Michael Diamond of The Old Ways Podcast about storytelling basics and you’ve got a morning full of useful information (some of it were things I needed to hear from someone who isn’t me, but it was validating to hear that even Mike uses index cards to organize his story beats). Fun fact: I was both elected and fired as door person at this workshop in the span of ~2 minutes! 

But from that amazing panel, I had to sprint to a game…I was running the slasher-flick inspired “Saturday the 14^th," written by Rina Haenze (I chose to run it on Saturday, why not?). When you see a figure on a lake, in a boat, who isn’t responding to being called or having rocks thrown at him, what do you do? If you picked “Pull out my sidearm and start shooting at him...well not to hit him, just put a few holes in the boat so he’s gotta come to shore," welcome to this table. And anyone who has played a game with me knows I love to put in Easter eggs...Had a fun one with Leslie “XPLovecat” Horn (and her husband Will), throwing back to a Kult: Divinity Lost game we had on stream with Symphony Entertainment (please mind the trigger warnings if you watch that). Even gave myself chills when an eldritch being, with its back turned simply says “Don’t disturb my work.” It’s wise to heed that warning. Or to roll a 01 on a point-blank firearms roll. Both work, really. 

(Ahhh… the chaos gremlins that visited Shady Pines Summer Camp. Remember Will, if you try to get a one-up on your Keeper, they’ll make sure you pee your pants.)

This was followed by an AMA with Mike Mason and Paul Fricker, in which Mike signed my Keeper’s Handbook with a giant smile. For reference, my handbook is a hand-me-down of sorts. A friend on the How We Roll Podcast server had purchased a copy, but it was missing pages. They offered it as a freebie to anyone who would use it, as a gift (including high quality prints of the missing pages). I pounced and thus began my time as a Keeper (this was around 2019/2020ish…I told you I was new to this!). Mike took one look at the book, slapped a hand on my shoulder, and said “This makes me happy. This is a well-loved, proper book.” He even wrote so inside! 

(Look at those lovely sticky note tabs, the subtle bruising to the spine… my God, it even has a watermark) 

I wandered back to the lobby and was sitting just chatting when the unequaled Al “Diesel” Smith just goes “Anyone wanna play a pickup game of ‘Victor Frankenstein: Reanimator’? I can run it in about 2 hours…” I’d played with Al in a game of Brain Soda before (which will go down in infamy) but playing with him in person was a wildly different experience. Lest you think it was a negative one, I’ll just add that it was “another perfect game”! If you know, you know. As it is a Regency scenario, I naturally opened with a massive social faux pas followed by walking arm in arm with Heather’s character who was happy to see someone dunk on Dr. Frankenstein. I’ve yet to play with someone as feisty as Heather, especially while retaining the Regency etiquette (or lack thereof). It’s wild getting to play games with people you’ve known online for a while. 

(It…is…alive… and fueled by adrenaline - seriously, I was starting to crash by this point.) 

The final night of the Con we all just existed, those of us that weren’t leaving first thing in the morning. Walked out of the hotel to the fire pits with Tim and Bucho, whiskey and cigars in tow, with creators like Lynne Hardy, Paul Fricker, Matt Ryan, among so many others…Just sitting around and laughing. Sharing stories. Joking around. That’s the community Paul was talking about. You really do meet the nicest people at horror conventions. 

The next day, we took over the board room of the Eagle Crest Resort for a game of “Field of Screams” with Towie and Bucho, and Al in the Keeper’s chair. We stopped in at the Lurking Fears room, realized we’d lost a few players (likely owing to Con hangovers, exhaustion, or just straight up forgetting). When your Keeper suggests “Hey, there’s a cool boardroom right across the hall, let’s go there. The chairs are better,” you do it. A truly memorable game, complete with arguing that to play baseball is to be closer to God and a chase scene that actually played out flawlessly! (Seriously, pick up this scenario if you need help with chases, Al did a great job and showed us the Keeper resources he prepared). Though maybe a bit anachronistic, you could hear “In the Arms of an Angel” by Sarah McLachlan playing thanks to Bucho’s heroic sacrifice involving a bandolier of dynamite at the end. RIP Cannonball. 

(Look at these chairs! And these people! There’s something special about smaller tables like this.)

Finally, we come to the last game of the Con before I drove off into the night (is 6:30 night? It is now.) I ran “UNLAND” by Scott Dorward, taking over the boardroom again. A creepy scenario about an abandoned amusement park, it has a million possible ways to play out. As written, the scenario is ~4 pages and mostly just descriptions of rides and NPC stats. It vacillated between slapstick comedy and chilling horror seemingly interchangeably. Honestly? I wasn’t sure how to feel about it. I love the darkness of the scenario, but when you’re trying (and failing) to tie a body to a bumper car to sink it in the lake, it felt off. 

But then I saw it. 

Bucho, a man who writes horror fiction (seriously, give him a read; no he didn’t tell me to say that, I just really loved this book) became visually unsettled at a number of the story beats. He went visually pale when he found a certain story beat wandering the park. Not to mention his realization that a choice he made wasn’t going to end well for him. How many mirrors are there on a carousel? We decided 8 (people who’ve read this scenario can guess how this went). When we started this game, I mentioned that it's one of my favorites to run, and at the end, Bucho said “I can see why. That was really amazing, dude.” That friendly validation warmed my heart to a degree he doesn’t even realize. And I know he’s gonna read this. It’s going on his blog after all. And he even gave himself a wonderful Cheshire Cat/Scarecrow from the Wizard of Oz epilogue that’s better than I could have written. 

I could go on and on about the times just sitting in the lobby (overhearing things like Roo from Winnie the Pooh participating in a blood ritual or discussing the best ways to execute a bout of madness…), chatting with people, the random trips around Ypsilanti for food (who would have thought that a Mexican restaurant in a gas station would be better than Michelin starred food?), stuffing a suitcase full of challah bread and honey butter (thanks Ali!), or how a group of not-quite strangers descended upon a hotel resort to experience horror and horror gaming, but instead found family and community. We found happiness. We found our joy. Was it perfect? No. Rarely are things perfect. But this convention was better than perfect. It was special. 

 

Unlike Roy Batty’s recollection of memories soon to be lost like “tears in rain," these memories among so many more will be etched into my heart for the rest of my life. To my Con family, I love you all. You’re amazing. I can’t wait until Chaosium Con 2024 to see you all again. I’ll bring the cookies. 

(Pins courtesy of Symphony Entertainment and Michael Diamond of the Old Ways Podcast, banner from the Good Friends of Jackson Elias Podcast)

Here’s a list of all the games referenced, where to find them, and a brief pitch. Check them out! 

o   “All Part of the Game” by and run by Matt “Doc” Tracey (hey that’s me!)  

§  When a murder mystery party goes wrong, are the Investigators safe? Or is it all just a game? 

o   “Penetralia” by Scott Dorward, run by Paul Fricker (not published yet, but will be a buy on sight for me)

§  When someone doesn’t show up for their birthday party and is presumed missing, will you go through the door to find them?

o   “Saturday the 14^th” by Rina Haenze, run by me

§  A massacre at a summer camp turns a normal happy summer day into a horrorshow. Can you find the masked maniac before they strike again? 

o   “Victor Frankenstein: Reanimator” by Al “Diesel” Smith, run by Al 

§  A doctor claims to have harnessed the power of life itself. Is it real or is it just bunko? Better put your hump in to it. 

o   “Field of Screams” by Al “Diesel” Smith, run by Al

§  When the All-Nations baseball team rolls into town, usually there is much celebration and excitement for the game. Why is the town so afraid to play on the field? 

o   “UNLAND” by Scott Dorward, run by me (available in Fear’s Sharp Little Needles by Stygian Fox)

§  An abandoned amusement park beckons you in. What you’ll find isn’t a carnival… 

(5,284)